Swinging or Affairs?

Many men and women are tempted with an affair at some point in their marriage. What if you could have that affair only if your spouse can have one too?

Many people have affairs which when caught become the catalyst to a divorce, but why did they have that affair? What has changed over the years?

Many times, I’ve taken my girlfriend out on a date…She also happened to be my wife, but even then, there has been temptation to be with another woman, and she has had desires to be with another man. The piece that’s missing in a marriage is the chase, the hunger, the wanting, the lusting.

Sex is important to a Healthy Marriage.

Sex is a small part of marriage, but it’s an important part. Is she having an affair if she’s using a vibrator or Dildo? What if she has a Dildo twice the size of her husband’s cock? Should that make the husband feel inferior, or should he cherish her and want to be part of using that toy with her to please her? Just as a husband should want to pleasure his wife, she should want him pleasured as well and be cherish that together.

Pleasure Keeps the Heartbeat in a Marriage 

The debate is how to receive that pleasure. What if you looked at sex with someone, other than your spouse, as a human toy. One that can talk versus vibrate? Maybe you can find one that vibrates too. (humming ABC’s doesn’t count). If you and your spouse were to have sex with another woman, and you were both pleasured and enjoyed each other, what would be the downside? The same holds true for another man. A husband loves to see his wife pleasured. Her happy face, her expression of arousal, or even climax is a huge turn-on for a man. What if the husband and another man can provide double that pleasure, then he leaves and it’s the two of you to cuddle and laugh at the enjoyment you just had?

Swinging Keeps a Marriage Alive

Consensual sex makes people happy. They smile at the mere thought of it. Having been swingers for over 15 years, we have many friends all over the country. Meeting them, going out for wine or any other social event and knowing you’re wanted again by someone other than your spouse is like a drug. It makes your heartbeat faster, your adrenaline rush, it makes you blush at the thoughts of what you did or want to do with that other person. It brings you back to your single youth. When you do have sex with them, you return to your spouse happy and excited and perhaps share something new them in your own bed.


How would you react if all inhibitions were lowered? You had your eyes on an attractive man, you’ve been watching him for an hour and heated thoughts ran through your mind. Now that man walked up to you with a smile. He flirts with you; he notices you blush. He eventually reaches his hand to your cheek and tells you how beautiful you are. He then leans in to whisper, “I want to ravish your body so badly.” How would you feel at this point? Your subconscious would probably force you to take his hand and go for it. So, why don’t you?


Same story, what if you could go to a social event, you’ve had your eye on an attractive woman for a while, and she looked back to you with a smile. What if you could go up to her and chat, and all you had to do was ask her to go into a room to have sex with her? THIS HAPPENS! We’ve been to perhaps a hundred swingers parties and have hosted maybe twenty. This, and many other scenarios happen. I (husband) had two women come up to me in a party and ask if I wanted to get the party started. My wife had been flirting with a man for weeks at Meet & Greets. No more than ten minutes into the party he asked her if she was ready, and her response was, “What took you so long to ask?”

Swinging Will Make Your Life Happy

We know of couples who tried swinging and had gotten a divorce. We also learned that most of those marriages were not very strong to begin with and they tried swinging as some last-ditch effort. Swinging is not the answer to saving a marriage, but it is an answer to enhancing it, and making a strong marriage even stronger and more exciting. Read through Our Secret Life – Our Awakening and see how Ryan and Ginger entered the lifestyle and what they learned along the way.

You might also enjoy

Skip to content